I just want to know. Anonymously.. do you ever get over that one who broke your heart? The thing is.. I know you do. I know I will. With enough time, you eventually forget the quirks, right?
This isn’t my first love.. so I should know. So when does life become normal again? When do you forget the things that made your heart race? When do you stop missing the person you thought you were destined for??
Eventually??
The thing with eventually is ..it’s not now. It’s not a year or five years... it’s whenever your heart and your brain stop finding these little things in everyday life that make you remember them. When the song you made love to eventually becomes a song from the past. When you stop remembering the way his lips looked that moment he was going to kiss you, just right before he went in for the thrill.. like the rising of a roller coaster and then the fall. It’s the car he used to drive.. the way you look into every damn window to make sure it’s not him, but oh how you wish it could just be him. How you see people walking around that look just like him, your heart starts to beat so loud and your whole world just freezes around you. Your heart beat goes into overdrive until you realize how crazy you are for actually thinking is was him. How crazy it is that from the day my heart was broken.. I have been non stop trying like hell to forget him. Erase that first kiss and travel back in time to where I was just a girl, not in love. Just a girl who didn’t feel these things. A girl who was used to the way life was and all of its given hand me downs. I never deserved to love like that.. I stepped in someone else’s timeline and broke destiny. I stole a destiny that was never mine to take. Now I am paying for it by the flashbacks of his hands touching my face and the way he looked at me. The raw feeling of the way I felt. I can’t get past it.. I am only tortured by it. I am stuck in my life.. just going through the motions. Getting kicked and trampled by these feelings that I have to hide. So when does it stop? When do I officially begin to breathe again? When does my heart stop hurting? Because it’s already been two years, and I can’t get over him. I know I don’t deserve that kind of relationship... but it would be nice to stop hurting this much. To just go ONE day without thinking about him. That would be nice. That would help. You just can’t help who you fall in love with......
This isn’t my first love.. so I should know. So when does life become normal again? When do you forget the things that made your heart race? When do you stop missing the person you thought you were destined for??
Eventually??
The thing with eventually is ..it’s not now. It’s not a year or five years... it’s whenever your heart and your brain stop finding these little things in everyday life that make you remember them. When the song you made love to eventually becomes a song from the past. When you stop remembering the way his lips looked that moment he was going to kiss you, just right before he went in for the thrill.. like the rising of a roller coaster and then the fall. It’s the car he used to drive.. the way you look into every damn window to make sure it’s not him, but oh how you wish it could just be him. How you see people walking around that look just like him, your heart starts to beat so loud and your whole world just freezes around you. Your heart beat goes into overdrive until you realize how crazy you are for actually thinking is was him. How crazy it is that from the day my heart was broken.. I have been non stop trying like hell to forget him. Erase that first kiss and travel back in time to where I was just a girl, not in love. Just a girl who didn’t feel these things. A girl who was used to the way life was and all of its given hand me downs. I never deserved to love like that.. I stepped in someone else’s timeline and broke destiny. I stole a destiny that was never mine to take. Now I am paying for it by the flashbacks of his hands touching my face and the way he looked at me. The raw feeling of the way I felt. I can’t get past it.. I am only tortured by it. I am stuck in my life.. just going through the motions. Getting kicked and trampled by these feelings that I have to hide. So when does it stop? When do I officially begin to breathe again? When does my heart stop hurting? Because it’s already been two years, and I can’t get over him. I know I don’t deserve that kind of relationship... but it would be nice to stop hurting this much. To just go ONE day without thinking about him. That would be nice. That would help. You just can’t help who you fall in love with......
